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ODDS and Ends of Wrestlemania and Other Ways to Build More Casinos in Las Vegas
So, did you win the under/over bet on how long it would take The Undertaker to snort or roll his eyes for the first time during Wrestlemania?
Las Vegas is officially running out of free time.
Wrestlemania memories for the News-Herald DotComedy staff mostly revolve around Hulk Hogan tearing his little brother’s T-shirt off before preparing to body slam Andre the Giant in some grotesque grappling ballet/soap opera that makes “General Hospital” seem like a biker rally in San Francisco in the late 1960s.
Oh, how things have changed, folks.
Now, the boys in Las Vegas are involved and it is really, really George “The Animal” Steele in a Speedo kind of scary.
Gone are the days of a cage match, a battle royale and a finale involving Hulkamania with the results being the results - no questions or debated decisions. In, now, are the touts who can now somehow put odds on a scripted entertainment showcase of suntan oil, steroids, bright lights, loud music, testosterone milkshakes and drool.
How? Why? What? Where? When? Who makes this decision to set odds on Wrestlemania? Are we really that desperate for wagering opportunities in this country, people? Tell us that bingo, lottery or eating Chinese food 10 days past the expiration date isn’t enough of a daily gamble that we need as a society to parlay The Miz with Snookie in a $100 saver bet?
If that is the case, the DotComedy staff would like to volunteer to be turnbuckled 200 times until we pass out and wake up in a better reality.
Look, we aren’t knocking Wrestlemania or the fans that are so passionate for it. If that is your thing, go ahead and get Junkyard Dog crazy with it!
But do we need odds on it from Caesars Palace?
Folks, there are limits and boundaries that we all should live by. We as a staff enjoy the occasional wager, but it has never occurred to us to seek out gambling options in the world of professional wrestling.
Not to mention, according to some avid Wrestlemania fans, there was plenty of controversy on the end of a few matches. Good luck trying to convince Guido at The Mirage that your ticket might be good upon further review.
Apparently, football, basketball, baseball, hockey, golf, boxing, tennis, curling, horse racing, dog racing, texting and competitive waffle eating aren’t enough options to bet on. Now we need the ghost of Vince McMahon to inspire the bookmakers at the Golden Nugget … oops, sorry, forgot Vince is still kicking - we think. Or is that an animatronic muppet at the New York Museum of Art?
We hope you won big cash on the Wrestlemania main event! For the DotComedy staff, we are just glad there wasn’t a Vegas line on how interested we were in the results on Sunday night. Anything over a dead tree pumped with Nyquil would have been a loser.
Sorry, Hulk.
Got a problem with that? Take it up with Andre the Giant.
BTilton@News-Herald.com
Las Vegas is officially running out of free time.
Wrestlemania memories for the News-Herald DotComedy staff mostly revolve around Hulk Hogan tearing his little brother’s T-shirt off before preparing to body slam Andre the Giant in some grotesque grappling ballet/soap opera that makes “General Hospital” seem like a biker rally in San Francisco in the late 1960s.
Oh, how things have changed, folks.
Now, the boys in Las Vegas are involved and it is really, really George “The Animal” Steele in a Speedo kind of scary.
Gone are the days of a cage match, a battle royale and a finale involving Hulkamania with the results being the results - no questions or debated decisions. In, now, are the touts who can now somehow put odds on a scripted entertainment showcase of suntan oil, steroids, bright lights, loud music, testosterone milkshakes and drool.
How? Why? What? Where? When? Who makes this decision to set odds on Wrestlemania? Are we really that desperate for wagering opportunities in this country, people? Tell us that bingo, lottery or eating Chinese food 10 days past the expiration date isn’t enough of a daily gamble that we need as a society to parlay The Miz with Snookie in a $100 saver bet?
If that is the case, the DotComedy staff would like to volunteer to be turnbuckled 200 times until we pass out and wake up in a better reality.
Look, we aren’t knocking Wrestlemania or the fans that are so passionate for it. If that is your thing, go ahead and get Junkyard Dog crazy with it!
But do we need odds on it from Caesars Palace?
Folks, there are limits and boundaries that we all should live by. We as a staff enjoy the occasional wager, but it has never occurred to us to seek out gambling options in the world of professional wrestling.
Not to mention, according to some avid Wrestlemania fans, there was plenty of controversy on the end of a few matches. Good luck trying to convince Guido at The Mirage that your ticket might be good upon further review.
Apparently, football, basketball, baseball, hockey, golf, boxing, tennis, curling, horse racing, dog racing, texting and competitive waffle eating aren’t enough options to bet on. Now we need the ghost of Vince McMahon to inspire the bookmakers at the Golden Nugget … oops, sorry, forgot Vince is still kicking - we think. Or is that an animatronic muppet at the New York Museum of Art?
We hope you won big cash on the Wrestlemania main event! For the DotComedy staff, we are just glad there wasn’t a Vegas line on how interested we were in the results on Sunday night. Anything over a dead tree pumped with Nyquil would have been a loser.
Sorry, Hulk.
Got a problem with that? Take it up with Andre the Giant.
BTilton@News-Herald.com
posted by News-Herald Blogs at
11:48 PM
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